*me coming down stairs*
mom: now that you’re awake, can you clean th-
"i don’t like garlic bread"
when there’s a fire, don’t forget to stop, drop and pop it, lock it, polka dot it, country-fy it and hip-hop it
when it’s the middle of the night and u hear ur parents waking up
That last guy though.
opinions on abortions are kinda like nipples
everyone has them but women’s are a little bit more relevant